The other day, a comment was made that I needed to be more collaborative. For days, I’ve gone back and forth in my mind over this statement. I know that I have spent a great deal of time collaborating with others when they reached out to me. However, in my own life, the reality is that I have NOT been great at being an instigator of collaboration. Wow… When I embark on creating something, I am a bit of a control freak. In my mind, I have to "own" every piece. I may ask for opinions but I have never really asked for ideas. Those two actions are completely different. Asking someone for their opinion is really about the validation of your own thoughts. You will consider what they have to say but what you are truly seeking is a nod of approval because otherwise, what you aimed to do may be invalidated. On the other hand, seeking ideas is about opening your mind to the input of others at a greater depth. You will not only consider what they have to say but also allow your work to be changed. Ideas change "your work" to "our work" Embarking upon my path to being a better collaborator means that I have to let go and relinquish control. Today, I own this new journey both personally and professionally. There are elements of what I do that may very well be mine alone but I can identify plenty that would be greatly improved by including other voices in the conversation. Collaboration is the key to growth, after all. Yesterday, during David Jakes and Christopher Long’s session on "Wonder by Design", I found myself sitting in a group embarking upon an activity that required total collaboration. I will admit to being uncomfortable with NOT controlling it. It was frustrating waiting on others to come up with their parts however it was also instructional. Collaboration has nothing to do with the individual person and everything to do with the growth and outcome of the entire group. We all have room to grow in many areas and when we collaborate, our weaknesses can very well be another person’s strength. I like to think of collaboration as a "self-healing circle" and it only works if we are open to it. Step 1: Let go and relinquish control Note to Self…    

I was raised to be fearless yet I have lived most of my life in fear. When I was the "biggest" girl on my high school dance team at a "whopping" size 12, I could hear my mother mid-field screaming… "Smile baby and act like you own the place!" So I did! Insecurities can get the best of us. We all have those moments when we wonder both inside and out if we are in fact good enough to complete our endeavors. That’s why we spend so much time working, researching, role-playing…preparing. It’s natural to have some sort of doubt…fear. It’s what pushes us to be great. However, it can also hinder us from our goals. The only way to truly capitalize on your greatness is to face your fears head on. What is holding you back? For me…it was, ironically, performing in front of a crowd. It’s so funny saying that because I grew up as a trained public speaker. I played the flute in front of live audiences. I performed in college as a drum major weekly. I danced, even as people laughed at me, in front of crowds. I sang a duet in church once. Heck, I teach groups daily! Yet, public performance WAS my greatest fear. With all that I have done in my life, why would I let the fear of performing get the best of me? Simple…the thought of others judging me more than I judged myself was crippling. I just knew that when they looked at me, they saw all of my imperfections and that was scary. In the past year, after leaving my hometown, something within me clicked. Something said… Stop worrying about who is watching(Smile bigger). Stop wondering who is listening (Sing).  Stop worrying that you may not be smart enough (You are brilliant). Stop worrying that you aren’t "beautiful" enough (I am). Stand firm in all of your imperfections and be the brilliant woman that you were born to be! I realized that in order for me to reach my true potential, I had to be strong enough to leave all of the negative doubts behind. When I work with teachers, especially those that are afraid to leave their comfort zones, I connect with them on a deeper level…that place that holds them back. We talk about it and coax the "fear monster" from its corner and kick it to the curb. For me, it’s beautiful to see as these teachers let the grips that have held them back fall. It’s like watching my own insecurities disappear over and over again. When you see me, unless it’s in a karaoke bar, I’m happier. I’m smiling and yes…I’m owning it! It’s what I was born to do. My mother taught me that. PS: It’s amazing to find your own inner fabulousness but it’s even more amazing to empower others to do the same. #BeFearless xoxo  

There was a time when I was one of those people who had their phone out for everything. I would text through dinner. I would text while talking and oh my…let’s not even consider TWITTER! We attend conferences and capture thoughts using a backchannel. The entire time that the keynoter is speaking, we are tweeting using a hashtag. We do this knowing that we won’t capture everything but because it’s a backchannel, we know that someone will. Have we all grown accustomed to capturing thoughts in bits while leaving the rest to be read in "bytes"? As much as I love technology, I find that I personally capture more without it. I carried my chromebook, phone and ipad to educon. I couldn’t even bring myself to use any of those devices because I could not bare the thought of missing something. When I sit and talk to people, I find myself entranced by the nuances of how they speak. I pay attention to small things like emotional connection to ideas instead of whose tweet I just missed. When the conversation is done and the thoughts are heard, I then reflect and process. This time, I grab the technology. While others can multi-task like lightening, I find that being free to absorb without tech is something that works for me. It’s a personal preference and one that has only developed after seeing myself for the over-tech using person that I am. Don’t get me wrong…I LOVE technology but I think that we should also be mindful of our own limitations or lack there of. I’ve had many great conversations in the last few weeks. My phone stays either face down or in my purse. I can’t even imagine how much I would have missed had I been consumed with my connected world through my device. I can’t imagine what I would have missed had I not been fully present in that "after privilege" library conversation at the end of educon. Something has to be said about having powerful meaningful conversations without the glare of a shiny window. So, in essence…in lieu of allowing technology to rule my learning, I choose my connections wisely. We should consider allowing students to do the same. It is a life skill after all.    

I’m going to guess that I am not alone in saying that there are definite moments when I feel overwhelmed. Between the speed and complexity of all aspects of life, there are moments when you just need to stop, wait and breathe. We all have those days. Today was mine. As I sat at my desk after the office cleared, I had some time to reflect on what exactly is clogging my thoughts. The only word that I could even muster was…PATIENCE. We are such an instantaneous bunch. We want everything to happen like yesterday! That’s not a bad thing but we have to be mindful of how life really works and it’s not always instant. Learning isn’t always immediate. Most books aren’t written overnight. You’re probably not going to make a year’s salary in a day. If you fail at a task, the road back may be long and tough but that journey in between is where the growth happens. It’s where we gain clarity. Rome wasn’t built in a day. These are the moments to let go, breathe, live and wait… It’s essential. Patience…

When the Zimmerman verdict came down, there were days of questions and discussions with my son. He was shocked and horrified that a young man, who looked like him, could be gunned down and his murderer walk free. When the Dunn verdict came, his reaction was vastly different. My son flicked off the tv, shrugged his shoulders and walked away muttering a word that I often use in unbelievably expected situations…"typical". When pressed further, my son said… "Jordan was black and in Florida. Did you honestly expect different?" That conversation soon shifted to the Stand Your Ground laws and more specific details of the case itself like jury selection and prosecution. As I was talking to my son, and reveling in his brilliance, reality struck me in an instant… What if it were my son? What would he do? What would I do? I thought about all of the conversations that we have had already…that my father had with my brother…on how "not to be arrested" because of _____while black. Yes, that conversation is just as necessary as  the talk of relationships and sex. We have to have it. Truthfully, it doesn’t matter what we teach him. As my son pointed out… "Guns don’t kill black boys. Racism does. Laws allow them to get away with it… so guess what, it’s gonna keep happening. This is normal mom." This is my son’s perception of the world that he lives in. This is what he meant by…"typical". We can teach him how to live by a "code" all day but we can’t protect him from the world as long as laws like Stand Your Ground exist which allow people to react out of fear…with his face being what people will fear most. The only difference between my son, Jordan and Trayvon is that he is mine. His face could have easily been theirs. While my son thinks…typical…this should most certainly not be normal. We have so much work to do. I can’t change my son’s face but maybe we need to discuss how you see his face. Maybe we need to discuss how his face alludes to a perception not seen in the faces of his peers. I don’t choose THIS normal. Not my son…  

Over the years I have mentored many pre-service and new teachers both in school and virtually. Those moments have been some of the most amazing moments of my career to date. I’m always interested in the on-campus experiences that many of these teachers are having. Ideally, pre-service and new teachers are in situations where they can grow while also having room to take risk during their own lessons. This is a must and is sadly not always the case. As a "new to the field" teacher, I was fortunate enough to be mentored by teachers who were open to my ideas. At the same time, I was equally as open to theirs. It was a truly collaborative effort and one that I believe is a must in any mentee/mentor relationship. Coming from the higher ed circuit, one might assume that almost all new teachers are starting "in the hole" but that was not the case with me. We researched and practiced varying instructional methodologies including engaging lesson development, hands on learning, technology integration and differentiated instruction. At the same time, my on-campus mentor had what I did not have…the experience. Although our teaching styles were as different as night and day, my mentor allowed me to design my lessons however I wanted using whatever tools that I had at my disposal. In other words, she stepped aside and allowed me to do what I felt was best even though they were vastly different from what she would have done. This was crucial to my growth as a teacher and as a future mentor. I had a conversation with a pre-service teacher the other day and I have to admit that her situation bothered me greatly. She wanted students to use manipulatives in a lesson where manipulatives would have most certainly made a difference. Unfortunately, her mentor did not see her vision and was adamant that students were incapable of learning using the hands on tool. The suggestion was that the pre-service teacher use a worksheet instead with the hands-on tool as a teacher model only. As depressing as this is…it happens. An idea that could have truly been transformative for students was shot down before it even left the ground…dead on arrival. Against her best judgement, this pre-service teacher felt that she had no choice but to water down her ideas to fit what her mentor believed and teach a lesson that, in her words, accomplished none of her goals. As a mentor, I could not imagine "cutting off a teacher’s feet" in this way. Even if I failed to see the vision of my mentee, I’ve learned that it is more important for them to work through their vision than it is for me to see it. I make it a rule of thumb to discuss ideas and make suggestions in obvious "managerial" places as needed. Growth happens for all parties involved as new teachers tackle their own instructional paths with the support of the experienced teacher in the wings. Reflection is key but open-mindedness is mandatory.  

For the past few years, I’ve watched my nephew thrive in pretty much whatever he set his mind to doing. He’s pretty meticulous about everything and fully commits himself to whatever feat that he is trying to accomplish. If you follow my postings via here on my blog or on instagram, I’m constantly sharing the insanely creative contraptions that he builds. From light up clay figurines and hand sewn professional grade puppets (image at the left) to his new super galactic solar system, this kid literally blows me away.   The Solar System Project Let me explain the contents of the box to the left. When Braeden was assigned his solar system, which he had a month to do, he immediately made a list of items that we needed to purchase from the store and demanded that we got them pronto. He made a plan that was more thorough than the house that we built as well as a timeline. He researched planets using everything from apps to NASA. The kid even "evaluated" his sources before validating their value. The first part of his project involved painting each planet according to his research with the most meticulous detail that I have EVER seen in my life. Somewhere along the line, Braeden decided that he wanted to create informational books featuring his drawings too. This is the only place that he asked for help was in laminating as he did not know how to use the machine. He does now. There is a rocket made from a water bottle and foil, that lights up, which should be no surprise since he also made clay figures that light up as well as a video explaining how he did it. In addition, those red and gold strips that give the "illusion" (his words) of fire light up too. Just to give your brain a break…He is 9!! On the computer, Braeden made signage to place in specific places of the cardboard box "painted thing" that will hold his solar system. We come home everyday and watch as he completes his other assigned work before turning his attention to the solar system that he only rushed to complete so that he can get back to drawing, molding clay and creating puppets, which he loves. I’m going to guess that he never envisioned himself enjoying this project but clearly he does as it keeps growing in magnitude to his excitement. I’m Sorry But Your Child is Really Smart but NOT Gifted Braeden has been tested for GT via the OLSAT (Otis Lennon School Aptitude Test…Pearson) three times and each time he did not qualify as gifted according to our district standards of scoring in the top 5%. This test, which is timed, does not account for kids like Braeden who are artistically and technologically gifted. This is a kid who takes his time to make sure that every thing that he does is to the utmost perfection…also a bad thing according to this test. Even sentences written for school are specifically crafted to be more thorough in their structure. Watching Braeden take his time to write, say aloud and reflect on each sentence is a poetic experience in and of itself. Math is evaluated from multiple forms before receiving his approval of logical correctness. He too, feels that the "check boxes" of his Excel Math worksheets are ridiculous. Braeden prefers to check each individual problem in context instead of adding answers to reach a number in a box. (his words) This kid brings home science worksheets that teach him nothing so that he can self-learn concepts that he wonders more about. We didn’t train him to be this way. This is how he is. This kid, who by my non-biased highly educated account, displays every sign of giftedness…yet the school district, THIS TEST, says that he is not. What To Do If This Is Your Child You can continue to advocate for him/her. You can challenge the system. You research state requirements for GT testing. You can even continue to push until the district listens and evaluates the equity of their entire program. You can fight while you watch the kids of the "top 5%" have access to learning opportunities that your child won’t have in his/her regular ed classroom in the hopes that one day he/she will. Or… You create a blog and share your child’s educational journey. Your child can create blog too which will serve as their digital portfolio. (which they will update as they see fit) You push for all classrooms to have access to rich learning opportunities so that every kid has the chance to shine as well as equitable exposure to rich resources on or above their level. You share everything…and not just because you KNOW that his teachers will assume that his parents did the project (never fails)…but because somewhere there is another parent experiencing the same frustration and your kid’s story might just help them too. To be clear…Braeden is surrounded by a well informed family who understand the system and his needs. His is NOT the norm by any accounts which begs the question… What about the "Braedens" who have no voice? Who is fighting for them?

When my daughter started college, I was determined to somehow cover every single expense so that she did not graduate with years of debt to pay. I don’t think that I actually realized how expensive her education would be and it’s not easy. I am lucky as she is attending college on her dad’s GI Bill for this entire first year ONLY but that doesn’t mean that the weight of expenses has been easy. Somewhere between paying out of pocket anywhere from $4000-$6000 per semester…I didn’t think this through…clearly. Don’t even get me started on adding in the expenses of attending professional development events that my district is not prepared to cover. (That includes YOU sxswedu) To add insult to injury, I drive a honda which is typically a reliable vehicle but I am now in the 2% of drivers whose entire car computer system just crashed. That’s another $1,000 at least which means that between sending housing payments to college, living expenses and now a broke down car…clearly my entire monthly salary is spent before it even arrives. Yet, I smile and continue to work and look ahead. The thing is, life is rarely a perfect picture. It’s downright ugly at times. At the same token, it’s also still amazing in the sense of looking from the lens of what lies ahead. We struggled at times growing up and I’m thankful for the example that my mother set because watching her pray her way through the hard times was highly educational. She saved what she could, took darn good care of us and eventually things just worked out. They always did…even when we worried that they would not. I’m sharing this piece of myself because honestly writing makes me feel so much better! Even saying that sentence out loud felt great. We don’t always get to choose our outcomes but we do get to choose how we react. There are so many great things that keep happening in my own professional life that if I even allowed myself to be defeated by the crazy low points, I would not be half as sane as I am to give 100% of myself to the work that I do. My example was my mother. I am the example for my children. I take that role seriously. If all else fails, there is always chocolate.

If you haven’t heard of Movenote yet, please stop reading and go check it out. As a matter of fact, download the app and use it on pretty much any device that you happen to be using. It’s a great tool for doing simple task like visually communicating an idea or even telling an amazing digital story because with movenote, you become a part of the story which means that your personality gets to shine through in lieu of text only. In schools, we use movenote with our kids utilizing chromebooks. They have the power to record and share video using items created and stored via their google drive. I was with a class last week as kids developed "pitch videos" for items that they invented. Movenote allowed them to present their product ideas beyond the typical google slide show or haiku deck alone. Once completed, links could easily be pasted into their edmodo assignment to turn in. A few weeks ago, I worked with a few social studies teachers as they were using movenote to create 3 minute clips for their students while also brainstorming ways for students to create with movenote as well. Users can also upload pre-edited video and include visual artifacts to accompany. Clearly, this is one tool that both teachers and students enjoy using. Note: Yes, it’s pretty much talking over still images, but let’s consider another way of using it. Think of principals using movenote to flip the topics that are often read aloud during staff meetings. Use movenote to "hear yourself" before presenting a major idea/lesson. If you’re bored with yourself, you can change it before boring others. For students, this is a great way for them to learn how NOT to present. Use movenote to teach them NOT to read every word on a slide but tell a story. It’s no secret that I’m a huge movenote fan but when I received an alert that they created an extension for gmail I was excited yet cautious about singing its praises without first using it. So I took the time to get to know the Movenote Gmail extension and below is my review. Movenote for Gmail I have to admit that I may or may not have actually sang a brief song to a few email recipients since downloading the new Movenote Gmail extension via chrome. With a button directly in gmail, it’s a simple as a click to eliminate the mixed messages that emails can sometimes cause. I can record a video of what I need to say while also incorporating images and docs as needed. With that said, there is a HUGE difference when using the movenote button directly in gmail. From a PC or Mac, I can only use files that are saved on my hard drive. I do not have an "add from drive" option which is strange. However, if I use the actual "movenote extension button" in my toolbar, I am taken to the movenote site to record and as long as I record from the site, I can use images and docs from Drive. Chromebook users always have the upload from drive option regardless. Now, the video that you create is NOT embedded into the gmail. You are instead pasting a link which I’m okay with because different devices treat embeds differently. The button adds convenience. I actually used Movenote for Gmail to invite writers to contribute vignettes to my book which enabled me to beg much more effectively than writing alone. Like any other tools, Movenote for Gmail has its place and I don’t use it in every email but when I really need to get a point across, it’s there and that’s a good thing. Tips: 1. Connect with Movenote using your Google account and create and send video to pre-created groups using the gmail button. 2. When students are working on movenotes together, use the pause feature to change speakers while recording. 3. Add a link of sources or more information by clicking the gear when videos are complete. The link appears at the end of the published product. 4. Use that same gear to change the background to give your movenote a different feel. (Love the Valentine Hearts!) 5. Still not sure how to get started? Take a tour of Movenote’s Help page

I remember the day like it was yesterday. A young man was sent to the office for putting his head down in class and refusing to lift it. As the young man walked by my classroom, he shook his head at me and tried to explain. As his teacher flew from his room to escort him to the office, he caught my eye and he understood to hush and say nothing. I heard his teacher say to him that he would be beaten by the cops one day and that he hoped he saw it. I could not believe my ears. I shook with anger and waited for the teacher to go back to his room and proceeded to the office to check on this child as well as report what I heard. There was never a conversation had with that teacher but that student was removed from that room and placed in mine because I asked for him. A few weeks ago, I found myself becoming unnerved while watching a twitter chat because of a statement made about "loving the hard to love kids". It bothered me so much because I thought of him. I thought of every kid that I taught that no one else seemed to want to reach. I imagine that they were amongst the "hard to love". These are kids that do not conform easily. They rarely do their homework and they may even speak up for themselves when they feel that they are wronged. They carry baggage from home as well as mounds of disjointed experiences from every classroom that they have been in. They can spot a caring heart a mile away and when they know that you care, you have them. At the same token, when they know that you despise them, they will return the favor. This is all that they know…survival 101. Life teaches them those lessons. In my classroom, beyond the standards that they had to learn, they also had to learn how to survive in a classroom that by its design wasn’t meant for them. They had to learn how one wrong response on their end could be the ammunition used to remove them from the learning environment. They needed to know when to hold it in and how to control the anger that they felt at classroom injustices. There were many. My mother taught us to choose our actions in spite of those that were against us. You can’t make a person care for you but you can choose how you react to their lack of caring. At the same token, these young men had to learn how to make personal adjustments in order to get what they needed out of a situation….a lesson that they knew very well. I can’t even begin to count the number of times that I happened to be there at the right moment to remind them of what they already knew. "Don’t say a word. Be still. Your words and actions will determine your place in this situation. Have the last thought" The difference is that this was taking place in a classroom, not driving while black and not in the streets. This was happening in a place that by its design was against them too. It’s rare that anyone sticks up for the "hard to love". Maybe it’s time that we did.